“It would be nice if hope could rally me. At the end of the day, I am a soft creature trundling through life under a hard shell, like so many of us that have survived (or at least refused to be squashed by) heavy boots. I have been squished though, and it’s embarrassing to recognize when I am living in the shape of the bootprint.”
This hit me so hard. I wrote a poem recently called Hope is a Small Animal, you might enjoy it. Squished always means you fall back into shape, maybe we’re made of memory foam in those bootprint moments.
Also I recently wrote a different poem about growing up in a world of contradictions and all the different realities I navigated as a kid. Mentioning these two poems not to promote them, but just that I think it’s cool we’re writing on similar themes. And to say what’s been helping me is finding places where I can bring those contradictions together and observe them, sometimes through words. or photos or drawing. Cats help too. And nature walks.
Thank you for sharing about your poems, Heidi! I absolutely love that you did that — it’s so easy to hide our work & I looove to hear about what you’re writing & thinking about & doing with thoughts. I like knowing we’re resonating too. I would be honored & grateful to read these.
"it’s embarrassing to recognize when I am living in the shape of the bootprint" yeah yeah yeah :( it takes soooo long to care out a different shape than the boot n when it rains that's the shape it goes back to n Yet we keep carving, etc. spite keeps me going too, and/also it's so! fucking! exhausting! lately the best i've got to offer myself is that it i tap out in a permanent sense i'm acting in the interests of the state which i cannot bear. so instead i'm continuing to live n eat up state resources which. as i'm typing it out. i'm realizing is a longwinded way of saying I'm living out of spite. ykhig
"it i tap out in a permanent sense i'm acting in the interests of the state which i cannot bear" yessss but yes soooo fucking exhausting but refusing not to be here. clinking spite flutes with you <3
“It would be nice if hope could rally me. At the end of the day, I am a soft creature trundling through life under a hard shell, like so many of us that have survived (or at least refused to be squashed by) heavy boots. I have been squished though, and it’s embarrassing to recognize when I am living in the shape of the bootprint.”
This hit me so hard. I wrote a poem recently called Hope is a Small Animal, you might enjoy it. Squished always means you fall back into shape, maybe we’re made of memory foam in those bootprint moments.
Also I recently wrote a different poem about growing up in a world of contradictions and all the different realities I navigated as a kid. Mentioning these two poems not to promote them, but just that I think it’s cool we’re writing on similar themes. And to say what’s been helping me is finding places where I can bring those contradictions together and observe them, sometimes through words. or photos or drawing. Cats help too. And nature walks.
Thank you for sharing about your poems, Heidi! I absolutely love that you did that — it’s so easy to hide our work & I looove to hear about what you’re writing & thinking about & doing with thoughts. I like knowing we’re resonating too. I would be honored & grateful to read these.
I’ll to remember to send them when I’m back near my computer!
"it’s embarrassing to recognize when I am living in the shape of the bootprint" yeah yeah yeah :( it takes soooo long to care out a different shape than the boot n when it rains that's the shape it goes back to n Yet we keep carving, etc. spite keeps me going too, and/also it's so! fucking! exhausting! lately the best i've got to offer myself is that it i tap out in a permanent sense i'm acting in the interests of the state which i cannot bear. so instead i'm continuing to live n eat up state resources which. as i'm typing it out. i'm realizing is a longwinded way of saying I'm living out of spite. ykhig
"it i tap out in a permanent sense i'm acting in the interests of the state which i cannot bear" yessss but yes soooo fucking exhausting but refusing not to be here. clinking spite flutes with you <3
1. Long live our Livejournals
2. You're not alone
3. I'm here and it's about all I bring to the convo at the moment other than the algorithm brought this post to me and it made me smile.
So happy you're here, friend. And may our livejournals live forever in lj Valhalla.